I have tried to teach my children that standing for what is right, is more important than standing for what is popular.  I did that yesterday and while it is true, it hurts too.  It hurts and I hope I never forget that when my kids knuckle under peer pressure.

This is what GOM must have felt like when she was elected Peace Chief of the Ho-Chunk prior to their split at Doty Island.  She stood alone many times in her long years.  The pressure must have caused some tremendous hurt.  She was hurt by her people, abandoned by up to 1/2 the once united tribe.  She stood alone when the French raided their crops and villages because she married a French man.  She stood alone when her husband Joseph left to fight in the Battle of St. Foye.  She stood alone when the tribal members treated her sons as outcasts.

Last night at a Heritage Preservation Meeting in DMC, I stood alone and called the Chair into question when he made a behind closed doors political move against me at the request of the History Center of Olmsted County Board Chair.  A chair to chair type of male bonding.  I did this at the suggestion of the City Attorney for DMC.  

Why?  I wear several hats in this DMC community.  I am a member of the GRADS group,  I was a member of the Advisory Committee for the History Center, and I am on the Heritage Preservation Committee.  The HPC unanimously voted to have me inquire about how the HCOC could help us with our research of sites and properties in DMC at our end of April meeting.  A day later I made an appointment to see the librarian at the HCOC and within hours of that phone call, the HPC chair ordered me to stand down from my assignment that the body of the HPC voted in favor of.  Confused I agreed to do this, but I wanted answers.  What had a done wrong?  What where the accusations?

A few weeks prior to this meeting, I went to a meeting at the History Center.  We were to meet Cara Clarey, the Curator.  She, Museology and our Advisory Committee wrote a grant to plan for a permanent Dakota Ho-Chunk Exhibit.  The Minnesota Historical Society declined the grant at first because there were NO INDIANS on the committee.  Our Advisory Committee was born.  Anyway, in mid April our GRADS group went to meet Cara at the History Center and we were met by the new Executive Director and she was NOT happy.  She said Cara participated in some illegal activity and introduced us to the NEW Curator.  We were all in shock.  The New Director feigned that she did not know why we were there.  She denied any knowledge of Cara's activities with our group.  It was terrible.  A gentleman from the Museology group said that he detected a great deal of hostility from the new director and she said with gritted teeth and distended neck veins, "Why do you think I am hostile?"  Within a few feet from where we started our meeting she told her first lie.  She boasted how she went to Mayo Clinic and IBM and got money from them and asked them how they would like their story told in the museum.  She also went to the Sisters of Assisi Heights and asked them how they would like to be portrayed at the history center.  Our GRADS President Betty Smith caught this and said, "You didn't ask us how we wanted to be portrayed."  She said, "I knew Cara was talking with you people."  She took us on a little tour and we found out that there was to be no planning for a permanent exhibit.  There was to be no research involving our Elders.  There would just be a tiny display of our ancestors "pre-contact."  

When I left the encounter, I fired of a letter to the board and recounted the entire incident and asked them what they planned to do with all of their artifacts.  I asked them it they would repatriate the items back to the tribes that they belong to.

Within a few days, the HCOC Chair called me and said that they planned to revise the grant.  He said it was he and Mr. Suk, the President Elect, that told the director to tell us about the illegal activity Cara was involved in relative to the grant.  He said he was just a construction worker and didn't know about museums or history.  I thanked him for the information and fired off another letter that said despite how we were treated, despite our sadness at the firing of Cara Clarey, we would try to work with them in the spirit of reconciliation so that our people would be presented accurately in their revised exhibit.

Now back to the order to stand down issued from Jeff Alleman.  I asked the City Attorney two times what I should do because I did not understand why the HCOC, namely Lisa Baldus and Jim Suk would do this to me.  Bring it to the group and ask for direction.  I contacted the Planning and Zoning group, John Harford and asked to be put on the agenda.  When Jeff learned about this, he went ballistic.  He threatened me, intimidated me, and hung up on me when we did speak on the phone with each other.  He did his level best to dissuade me from talking about his punitive action against me in the public forum, namely at our next HPC meeting.  The last straw came for me when he threatened me and stated, "Upon your insistence, and against my strong recommendation, we added your item to Tuesday's agenda.  I believe your antagonizing both me and the HCOC distract the HPC from its mission and reduces any potential for celebration of your Dakota heritage with either group."

Despite the private support I had from the City Attorney, Mayor Brede, and other Commissioners, when it came time for the public forum, I stood alone.  Jeff was excellent in this management of the meeting.  I was last on the agenda of 9 items.  We have never had 9 items.  We have never had an agenda so loaded with actual HPC work.  Jeff was actually kind to the "preservationist" as he calls them.  He rushed me through my presentation, which was a letter addressed solely to the Commissioners with no public comments by me.  I decided to take his suggestion and met him half way.  Lo and behold, he whipped out a letter from a vacationing Jim Suk which said that he didn't want me at the HCOC because I wrote an "antagonistic" letter to the Board.  Jeff made a plea to the body that he did this (changed the vote of the body) because he was thinking about the good of the HPC.  He said I failed to disclose this (the antagonistc letter to the HCOC Board) to the HPC group.  No comment from the commissioners when I asked for some action on the matter.  No comments other than poor Justin Voss who said that perhaps next time this happens there could be full disclosure.

Great!  This was just great.  No comment when I said that this has implications for all of us.  Anyone could call and talk with the Chair and be unhappy with us for any reason and we could have our role diminished.  No comment from anyone.  Jeff was in his glory.  He said, "Does anyone have anything they want to say?"  No comment.  He went on to say that I tried to have Valerie not bring this up.  I tried to talk with her.  After several emails, telephone calls, she hung up on me...she didn't disclose her conflict of interest.  I denied any conflict of interest.  I didn't tell the group that Jeff contacted me in the 11th hour.  He gave me just one day to respond.  I had nothing to gain from making an inquiry at the Library at the HCOC.  I had dealings with the HCOC Board not the Librarian.  No Ho-Chunk luck as my Choka would say.  As I was about to bring up the next issue on the agenda, Indian Heights Park and how Jeff threatened me, he cut me off.  Chairmen can do that.

The meeting ended on a good note though, despite his threats, Indian Heights Park was added to the Stark List.  Jeff and Justin tried to thwart it, but the silent partners were silent no more and it passed.  Thanks silent partners.  Yet, you must realize that someday you will have to stand for truth no matter of public of political opinion or support.  Yet I thank you for your vote.

I have sent a letter of resignation to the Mayor and Jeff.  I will resign effective September 1, 2014.  I stood alone for one meeting, but I am not fond of masochism.  I will stand alone until September. I do not need to feel a part of my community in this destructive and dysfunctional manner.  I am the only woman of color on this commission.  I was the only woman until this meeting.  I can do more for my people away from these men, who happen to be all white, and keep my sanity.

I was hurt last night.  Jeff made a mockery of my truth seeking.  He made being truthful and forthright seem passe'. He used his political maneuvering quite effectively. I didn't speak ill of anyone.  I wanted the group to make sure this never happens again, to anyone.  While I will likely stand alone until I resign, I take heart that I am in good company.  GOM stood alone through so much worse than I, yet she lived to govern her people in wisdom for years.  I am grateful for her example and the example of my Gram who also stood alone so many times in her life time.  I pale in comparison to these great women, yet I am hopeful that I can bear up under all the adversity that is yet to come.

Irony

A word about irony.  I think it is one of the most intriguing and unsettling phenomenon of our time.  I have felt it at various time of my life, but cast into the miasma thinking there was really nothing we can do to change our circumstances in these cases.

During my study of GOM, as I was sorting through my data, interviews and archival accounts, I was stunned to learn that white people readily embraced GOM'S story, while many Ho-Chunks did not.  GOM's descendants believed the accounts and those Ho-Chunks who did not, railed on GOM, and her descendants to this very day.  My research was not to prove or disprove her status of a peace chief, but rather I used the Vasina Model designed my Jan himself and myself, to learn if her story was within the threads of our oral traditions, and it was.  Her story was found among her descendants, in various clans and in the general population of the Ho-Chunk people.

Another case of irony is my work with the History Center of Olmsted County.  I worked with the staff of this organization to secure a planning grant for a Dakota-Ho-Chunk Exhibit.  One of the staff members, Cara Clarey worked tireless on the grant with the help of GRADS (my group) and Museology, plus several Dakota and Ho-Chunk experts.  The HCOC received a 10K planning grant, but in the process Cara and another co-worker were fired because they did not secure the "proper signatures" and now the planning grant will be revised and resubmitted so that the Board will have "more control" and the exhibit will be "more manageable."  The Board was always in control as they would have to approve all phases of the planning through the exhibit.  Now the ALL WHITE  Board will determine who will work on the exhibit.  This just reeks with irony.  Can you smell it? 

This next example from my life hurts.  My tears have stopped for now, but my heart is still aching.  Son was discriminated against at Century High School while he played soccer in 8th grade because he made the C Squad and while he was a freshman.  In academics, the English teacher/soccer coach did not follow son's 504 plan and did not put the assignments on the board or anywhere where son could access them.  His math teacher also failed to consistently follow his 504 plan.  Finally, someone at Century HS said, "Here is your 504 plan just tell the teachers they have to follow it."  The MN DOE, 504 compliance officer said this was terrible and contacted someone at the Edison Building to try and change how RPS complies with the law.

In soccer, all the kids of color are placed on the bench or on C Squad.  All the WHITE kids get to play on JV or Varsity no matter their skill level.  True to the stories, if you are a kid of color you better be really good or you won't play JV or Varsity.  Son made JV, but was immediately dropped to allow some WHITE kid to play.  He was dropped down to C Squad, wasn't given a whole uniform, and when he questioned the coach because he was a good player, they railed on him and belittled him. 

Enter me, Bear Clan mother.  The more I questioned their actions, the more they clammed up until son got hurt.  In Rosemount, son got injured.  He was playing goalie and was getting hammered in the goalie box.  Calls to the coach yielded no help.  The coach didn't respond to him until blood was running down his leg. 

Bear Clan Mother had enough and called for a meeting of the WHITE men in charge and it was there that they lied.  It was woefully apparent to me, with 20 years of Human Rights experience, that they were NOT accustomed to having a woman, a woman of color question them.  An interesting side note, when we waited to speak with the administration at Century, all white men, we couldn't help but notice that all the kids of color were squeezed into one side of the cafeteria and all of the white kids were on the wide open side of the cafeteria with wide windows and high seated tables.  It looked like a picture from the 50s'.

At this meeting, lie after lie was spoken by these men: son was never on JV, son didn't show up for JV tryouts, son was never hurt, son was never railed on or belittled.  I had proof of his position on JV (an email one of the coaches sent me stating that he was on JV - fools).  We had parents and team mates ready to state that son was at try outs and practice.  Paulo dad even met the coach to talk to him at one of the practice sessions, but Coach Drew went along with Coach Houghton and said, "I made a mistake, Paulo was never at tryouts."   We brought son to the doctor (even tho Paulo is a doctor and I am a nurse) to see about his wound.  Century HS wanted to see proof of the wound and we had to bring him to the PT to see if there was anything she could do.  What the...no, we will treat the wound ourselves with the help of our pediatrician thank you! Finally Coach Fogarty, oops Principal Fogarty said, "If you have proof that your son was on JV, send me the email."  I sent that email ASAP and nothing was ever done.  All of these grown men lied and used my young son to cover their failings, to cover up their institutional and individual racism.  Shame on them!

On and on this trickery went until they crucified themselves.  Son attended a party at the Thornburg residence where alcohol and marijuana were allowed.  The PARENTS WERE HOME!!!  He did not partake.  Of course we didn't know this, son was scared, but lucky for him or us or God is just looking after us in our many trials, son got sick that night.  We took him to the ER and standard procedure give the times we live in, I guess, is to run a drug screen.  They did and it was clean.  He was sick. 

One week later, we got a letter from the activities director saying that son could not play sports for 50% of the next season BECAUSE HE INGESTED a harmful substance.  What the ...?  We had a right to due process and could appeal the decision, but we had to put it in writing AND we had just one day to respond.  Did they time this just right or what?  When I called the director, he refused to take my calls.  My emails were unanswered.  I wrote a letter and my husband hand carried it to the directors office because if we wanted DUE PROCESS we had a time line.  We waited and there was nothing.  Days went by.  Calls were not returned.  Finally we got a letter from Century HS saying they made a mistake.  What?

Bear Clan Mother (though I should say that Choka said I was Eagle Clan) was done.  A complaint was filed with the MDE OCR, the complaint was accepted because they had jurisdiction and the claim had merit.  Son was taken out of Century HS. 

He is at Lourdes HS and is doing well.  He is still a struggling freshman, unorganized and constantly plugged in, but son hurt himself at track practice yesterday while pushing off the starting blocks.  He shaved his mile time down from 4:17 to 4:12.  No one at his old HS or even at our church for that matter believed his time, but we have proof.  The coach at Lourdes took a video of son running the mile and breaking the school record.  Today son is limping, using hot and cold packs intermittently, but he may not be able to run.  To come this far through all of the HELL he had to go through at Century, to go through HELL and trials at our church because he his Mormon attending a Catholic school, to finally be able to shine in track, and now he might not be able to run.  Irony hurts.

The picture I chose to head up this rant, blog, purging, cleansing is one of me and my oldest daughter.  She too went through so much trial.  Abused by her biological father, struggled with and still struggles with depression and addiction, but today she is doing well.  She is doing better than ever before.  She is my counter to such hurtful irony.  She is my hope that no matter how embattled one is, you can still smile, laugh,  and live to triumph another day.  Irony is with me, almost my constant companion these days, yet I know that if I hold on, keep moving forward, irony will be replaced by other feelings of a life well lived.